The New Bed

So things are progressing more and more lately, which is always nice and it makes me on permanent cloud nine. We got rid of lots of things/people in our life that just seemed to be always butting in and trying to bring us down. Not only that but, my "CM" has opened up so much to me that I see him in a whole new light and it is helping me understand some of the things that he does. This in turn has brought me to why I'm really sharing this....

We just made are first big purchase together (besides rent, bills, etc.): A NEW BED!!!!! I know this may not sound like much to some but for us, this is a good thing and a step closer together for our relationship. Granted we have talked about things that are going to happen and trips we want to go on later down the road, but sometimes it seems more real when something physical happens. I know this may sound vain but anyone who has been in a relationship, know exactly what I am talking about. Anyway back to the bed! We have both gotten the best sleep of our lives in the past two nights and I don't think I' m ever going to be able to sleep on a "regular" bed again....ahhhhhhhh....the comfort...

Hearts~n~Tarts

Ok so we all know what tomorrow is and the stress that seems to consume so many of us each year, that the true meaning of love is lost on this day.

I have always seen myself as a "hopeless" romantic who prides myself on going above and beyond to make that special someone in my life feel even that much more special on Valentine's Day then I do every other day of the year. With the careful planning of candles to set the mood, preparing their favortie meal-down to dessert, and of course finding that perfect card to let them know how much they mean to me...blah, blah, blah...

This year it feels as if something has changed inside of me though, not feeling all that "hopeless" romantic stuff that I had in the past. To me it's been more of Valentine's Day every day, where I cook dinner, give a massage if needed, and just enjoy one anothers company after a long day at work. True I might try and find a card to make tomorrow not seem like just another day but I just don't see the point of getting myself all stressed and over-worked and what to do to show how much I care for him. I don't see it as being less romantic or cynical, yet being more practical in my way. When it comes down to it I rather use that $50 to pay more off a bill than to go and spend money on something that could be forgotten down the road.

I do want to add a little end note though for all those guys out there...No matter how much a woman says she doesn't want anything or that this day is just another...SHE IS LYING! Every girl wants that fairytale life to some extent and yes, romance just happens to be one of these things. From personal experience, I rather receive a heartfelt card and a flower (not a rose, they are too overused) on Valentine's Day, rather than on my birthday.

Two Months Strong

Well it's been two months into dating and things are going pretty good. True there have been a couple of snags along the way, but that is expected when trying to get used to one another and learn what makes the other tick. Overall though I must admit, I still get butterflies when I think of him and the closer it gets time to go home, the more excited I get. Now we are even going on our first trip away together in a couple of weeks down to Philadelphia. True it is training for his job, but he wanted me to go just to spend time with him away from everything and of course to help with some of the driving. Plus I haven't been to Philly in a couple of years and have really been yearning to go and explore the city a little more. So I guess this will tell if we can really be serious and move forward...

It's all good...

So things just have a way of working themselves out and in way make you stronger as well. It took a little bit to get out of him what was wrong but letting him know that this didn't change what I thought about him and that as long as he was open and honest about it all, it didn't bother me that much. And you know something, it seems to be much more relaxed and laid back with us now that the big thing he didn't want to tell me, though I already knew, is out and in the open and not eating away at him.
So other than this, things are consistently getting better and we're learning new things about each other each day. I mean come on I didn't know I could be a freak and even like it for that matter. actually like it. It just cracks me up so much but at the same time it's like I always knew it was there, I just seemed to ignore it and keep it in the back of my mind....Okay now that is definitely me getting ahead of myself once again, ha! This so isn't what all this is about, that's just a little too personal.
Wow! Yeah! Needless to say I like what this all is but I'm just having fun and not letting anything too serious happen before I know what I truly want out of someone and then of course if they can offer it to me as well. But I will admit it could go there some day....You know as I read back over this I realize at how much I really sound like a little school girl and someone who has already fallen further than they know or want to admit and I'm not sure that I really like that too much....I am happy, he makes me happy, my friends are better than ever and that is where I just want to be right now...

Seriously Now...

How come when things are going along great, someone has to come along and try to ruin it all? I guess I could deal with this on most occasions and just write it off as people who don't know me, are just trying to hate on me and judge something they have no idea about. But when that someone is supposed to be your friend, that's when it really pisses me off and mostly hurts.
Okay I'm getting ahead of myself on this one...surprise, surprise...
Anyway, the carpet man and I have been dating for roughly three weeks and I couldn't be happier than I have been lately. Not only has he helped me quit smoking (which was way overdue), but he has helped bring back my love for cooking, to which I had pretty much given up on because no one ever seem to want to try out my new recipes. He compliments me and shows me that the littlest things can make the greatest difference in any one's life. I know that in the first few months this is how all relationships start out and everything is happy-go-lucky as if nothing could go wrong, beginning of all relationship feeling. Well if that's all it is going to be for now, I'm all for it, I like this feeling and wouldn't change it for the world.
Then of course in comes the friends and no matter what they will be by your side, or at least that is what you believe. One in particular divulge some things to me about my current beau a little while ago about his past, as to try and warn me. Of course I took it all in but didn't say anything to him because everyone has a past (and yes including me), and when he was ready to share this information with me, I knew he would. I mean seriously, what right do I have to pry and pick at things that I didn't even know him when this all was going on; I know there is plenty that I rather keep to myself and until the time is right, I will do just that.
As to make matters worse, she decides to come "clean" and let him know that she already told me because she felt I had the right to know and since he hadn't said anything to me (that she knew of), that it was time to take it all into her own hands. Well needles to say (but of course I love to state the obvious just in case), he got upset and therefore is in a bad mood, which of course puts a damper on my mood as well.
So yeah, that's the problem with some people and opening their mouths when all that should be done is keeping them shut and opinions to themselves. And yes I know that maybe she was looking out for me and my interests but seriously now, was it that or that she is so unhappy with her current love life (non-existing) that she had to make a splash in mine...
Well I guess all that can be done now is wait until tonight and talk it all out with my "CM" and see what comes about and if it is meant to be or if my blinders are really on too tight. Then of course the question of what to do about this "friend" and if she can be trustworthy any more.